When is Enough...Enough?

Confusing title, I know. But hear me out...

I have a hard time knowing when enough is enough. My friends will tell you that they have had to resort to kicking me or giving me a swift hit when I'm talking about something that I'm passionate about but it's either not the time or the place to mention it.

I try really hard. I do. However...

When something is going on that I know as a professional, a mom or just a good human being isn't right, I have a really hard time staying quiet about it if I feel there's a chance I can control the outcome. I've been thinking about why this is...why do I have such a need to help the underdog, save the world, make a difference, not just be quiet when it's politically correct to do so, not play the game, etc.? I think it's because no one did it for me when I was young.

We grew up in a very loving family but like all families, we had our problems. Many of our friends and other family members knew what was going on but NO ONE said anything to help us out. No one did anything to help. As children, my brother, sisters and I were left on our own to forge some sort of normalcy and routine to our dysfunctional existence. I remember feeling alone. I remember feeling abandoned. I remember wondering why this was up to us to fix when there were so many grownups around who knew what was happening but no one seemed to care enough to step in and do anything to help us.

So now I've got a bee in my bonnet. When I feel that is happening to another child (it's usually a kid but my siblings and I have been known to have an unnatural reaction to animals in trouble as well), I have a very hard time staying quiet about it. I do not want to be the adult that a child depended on and I was too busy or didn't want to get involved or thought it wasn't any of my business to help them out. So sometimes I get too noisy about what I think is right for the kid. I also get too noisy to the wrong people.

So when is enough...enough? When do I take a step back and ask myself if saving these kids from (what's screaming at my professional self) a bad education or an unfair situation that I may or may not have the power to do something about? Is it worth putting my job at risk? Is it worth losing money over? Is it worth my personal sanity? Is it worth my sleep at night? My mental health? These are questions that I know the answers to but are pretty scary to admit.

So I'm trying hard to remember that I can't save the world. I can't save every child from a bad home life. I can't make every kid in my class have the education that I think they deserve because I'm fighting their own demons, the restrictions and expectations of the school district and a million other factors. However...

I can be their voice. I can be the voice that no one ever was for my siblings and I. Maybe when one child grows up, they will be able to look back and say that not every adult in their life was quiet. Maybe they'll remember someone talking for them and trying to help. Maybe they'll feel less alone, less abandoned.

So that would be enough.